Missing Shorts And Other Worries

If we were having a coffee this week, I’d probably be repeating a lot of what I’ve already said in this forum this week.

My week has been dominated by redundancy again.  An announcement came out to the entire company late on Friday 6th saying that I was leaving.  I’m actually a little surprised about how many people have contacted me considering I was the last line of what was actually a long e-mail!  I would never have got to the bottom of it!

Most people ask two questions and the answers are somewhat related.  The first one is, “How do you feel?”  The second is, “So, when do you leave?”  The answers are related because I leave in two and half months and that feels like ages away at the moment, so I’m not too bothered by the whole thing still.  You know sometimes you think of things and you feel dread, kind of a knot in your stomach? I still don’t get that with this.

When it does get a bit more noteworthy is when other rubbish things happen, like my parking ticket.  Only a small thing, but I start to escalate it because when I think of £60, I’d rather be spending that on a week of food for the cat and I when I’m unemployed than for 13 minutes in a car park reading the car’s instruction manual.  Little stresses seem to become greater than the sum of their parts when they’re all added together.

Those knots in my stomach have happened with other things though, and I haven’t always been thinking about them, if that makes any sense.  A thought suddenly pops in to my head, seemingly triggered by nothing and I get that feeling.

I used to get criticised for “worrying” about people.  I’m going to write a series of posts on this which will be published in a few weeks but, if I just say here that sometimes it’s not worrying per se.  It’s just wanting to know that someone is OK, wanting to know how they’re doing, wanting to speak to them…

And as quick as the feeling comes, it goes again (even if the lingering feeling of wanting to talk to them remains for a little while longer).

In other news, I managed to get another 20 minutes of football under my belt this morning and, I think, have come out unscathed.  I found the game hard today – I didn’t seem able to get in to it.  We were winning 2-0 but there was enough still in it and I think I came on when everyone else was tired which meant the game was a little scrappy.  The pitch was also terrible due to recent heavy rain.

I should have known how things would go when I forgot to put any shorts on.  I normally put most of my kit on at home and take spare clothes with me for after the game.  I seemed to spend so long trying to find said spare clothes that I forgot about shorts so had to borrow someone else’s.  Oops.

Erm… I think that’s about it.  How’s your week been?

I don’t blame you
We got carried away
I can’t hold on
To an empty space

Now you’ve found a new star to orbit
It could be love
I think you’re too soon to call us old
When and where did we go cold?
I thought I had you on hold

And every time I let you leave
I always saw you coming back to me
When and where did we go cold?
I thought I had you on hold

Where does it stop, where does it stop
Where do you dare me to
You’ve got the body, you’ve got the body
Dare me to, dare me to
Where does it stop, where does it stop
Where do you dare me to
You’ve got the body, you’ve got the body

I thought I had you on hold

Where does it stop, where does it stop
Where do you dare me to
You’ve got the body, you’ve got the body
Dare me to, dare me to
Where does it stop, where does it stop
Where do you dare me to
You’ve got the body, you’ve got the body
Dare me to, dare me to

My young heart
Chance to believe
We were destined
Young hearts
All need love
Call it a lesson

The stars and the charts and the cards make sense
Only when we want them to
When I lie awake staring in to space
I see a different view

Now you’ve found a new star to orbit
It could be love
I think you’re too soon to call us old
When and where did we go cold?
I thought I had you on hold

And every time I let you leave
I always saw you coming back to me
When and where did we go cold?
I thought I had you on hold
I thought I had you on hold
I thought I had you on hold

Where does it stop, where does it stop
Where do you dare me to
You’ve got the body, you’ve got the body
Where do you dare me to, dare me to
Where does it stop, where does it stop
Where do you dare me to
You’ve got the body, you’ve got the body
You’ve got the body, you’ve got the body
Where does it stop, where does it stop
Where do you dare me to
You’ve got the body, you’ve got the body
Where do you dare me to, dare me to
Where does it stop, where does it stop
Where do you dare me to
You’ve got the body, you’ve got the body
Dare me to, dare me to

And every time I let you leave
I always saw you coming back to me
When and where did we all go cold?
I thought I had you on hold
I thought I had you on hold
I thought I had you on hold
And every time I let you leave
I always saw you coming back to me
When and where did we all go cold?
I thought I had you on hold
I thought I had you on hold
I thought I had you on hold

On Hold by The XX

Comments 1

  1. It must be a great relief to know that you aren’t feeling anticipatory stress where leaving your job is concerned….and, even if it surfaces later, it is great that you are not saddled with that prematurely .

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