Petty Hates : “Tricks Of The Trade”

Last year I went to Croatia on holiday for a week.  When I came home, I found that a bird had dumped its load down one of the car doors, and there it had stayed for the week, nicely baking and burning in to the paint work.

Even having taken off the bulk of it, the damage had been done.  Being able to see a bird splatter down the driver side door every day annoyed me at best and, in a very obviously first world problem, also upset me.  That was because there was nothing I could do about (both in terms of how it was caused and also removing) and also because, as much as I may not look it, I’m a bit of a perfectionist when it comes to this sort of thing.

Testament to that is my collection of car care products.  I have pretty much everything commercially available and even though I only have a small car, it can take me 6 hours to wash it, clay it, polish it and wax it as well as waterproofing the roof and valeting the inside.

Despite having all those products, though, I had nothing that could get rid of the burn.  Indeed, the most abrasive thing I had simply caused swirl marks around the burn, not touching the burn itself.

I noticed a white mark on another wing of the car just before Christmas and thought it was more bird droppings until it wouldn’t wash off and I realised it was chip in the paint.  I decided to take advantage of my cosmetic damage insurance (the burn isn’t covered) and the guy came to fix the chip today.  While he was here I asked if there was anything I could do about the burn and he ummed and arred before telling me a tale and saying that it’s probably too late.

I left him to it for around an hour and a half before he rang to tell me it was done.  As I walked to the car I could see the repaired chip before he also told me that he dealt with the burn.  I walked round and it had disappeared.  I was happier about it than was probably entirely appropriate!

He told me what he’d done and that he had a “special compound” which took it off.  It was only when I thought about it later on that I wondered why I couldn’t buy that compound, or why I hadn’t been able to find it on the internet.  That annoyed me too.

I realise it’s a trade secret that gives people an advantage, but in this instance why couldn’t I just know? I wouldn’t do any damage with it to them, I just wanted it for my own benefit.

It was one of my great frustrations, and still is, when in this day and age you can’t do something or can’t find something out.  Such a time is few and far between.  I always say at work, whenever anyone has a technical problem, to look at Google; we can’t be the first people to have had the problem or wanting a solution.

It’s even more frustrating when you know that there’s a possibility but you can’t do anything about it yourself.  This bird dropping burn was one of those things, which I think is why it annoyed me quite so much.

We, we don’t have to worry ’bout nothing
‘Cause we got the fire, and we’re burning one hell of a something
They, they gonna see us from outer space, outer space
Light it up, like we’re the stars of the human race, human race

When the light started out they don’t know what they heard
Strike the match, play it loud, giving love to the world
We’ll be raising our hands, shining up to the sky
‘Cause we got the fire, fire, fire
Yeah we got the fire, fire, fire

And we gonna let it burn, burn, burn, burn
We gonna let it burn, burn, burn, burn
Gonna let it burn, burn, burn, burn
We gonna let it burn, burn, burn, burn

We don’t wanna leave, no. We just wanna be right now (right), r-r-right now
And what we see is everybody’s on the floor acting crazy, getting loco ’til the lights out
Music’s on, I’m waking up, we fight the fire, then we burn it up
And it’s over now, we got the love, there’s no sleeping now, no sleeping now, no sleeping

When the light started out they don’t know what they heard
Strike the match, play it loud, giving love to the world
We’ll be raising our hands, shining up to the sky
‘Cause we got the fire, fire, fire
Yeah we got the fire, fire, fire

And we gonna let it burn, burn, burn, burn
We gonna let it burn, burn, burn, burn
Gonna let it burn, burn, burn, burn
We gonna let it burn, burn, burn, burn

When the light started out they don’t know what they heard
Strike the match, play it loud, giving love to the world

We gonna let it burn burn burn burn (burn burn)
Burn burn burn burn (burn burn)

We can light it up, up, up
So they can’t put it out, out, out
We can light it up, up, up
So they can’t put it out, out, out
We can light it up, up, up
So they can’t put it out, out, out
We can light it up, up, up
So they can’t put it out, out, out

When the light started out they don’t know what they heard
Strike the match, play it loud, giving love to the world
We’ll be raising our hands, shining up to the sky
‘Cause we got the fire, fire, fire
Yeah we got the fire, fire, fire

And we gonna let it burn, burn, burn, burn
We gonna let it burn, burn, burn, burn
Gonna let it burn, burn, burn, burn
We gonna let it burn, burn, burn, burn

When the light started out they don’t know what they heard
Strike the match, play it loud, giving love to the world
We’ll be raising our hands, shining up to the sky
‘Cause we got the fire, fire, fire
Yeah we got the fire, fire, fire

And we gonna let it burn

Burn by Ellie Goulding

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