Welcome to The Nine Month Review!
“What,” you may ask, “are you doing writing a 9 month review? In July?”
Well, 280 days ago, I had a dream that I was pregnant. I wrote about it here. I knew who the mother was, but there was no way I expected it to be her even if our anatomies allowed for such a thing to happen. My baby was late, so we went home and laughed at my cousin’s windows while we waited for my caesarian.
My cousin does have a very curiously placed window. No, that’s not a euphemism.
Now, a dream about being pregnant is actually of fairly obvious meaning (if you believe in that kind of thing) – it’s developing something new. Different sources suggested looking forwards or backwards 9 months from the day of the dream for clues. Writing weekly diary posts as I do, looking back nine months was relatively easy.
Nine months before the pregnancy dream, I had another dream. I was following somebody and that included me hiding in a car and under a bed, and then I ended up in an action film with explosions and guns after I commissioned my own getaway car to be built. Interestingly, the person I was following was also the mother of my baby.
Hiding in a dream is either just that – hiding – or showing that you’re ready to tell someone something. Cars are to do with motivation and a bed is a sanctuary. Dream should be interpreted based on what they mean to the dreamer, and that’s telling me that I was hiding something because it was easier, which I sometimes do. There was something about a gun, and guns represent anger, but it was either in a box or being wielded by the person with the one I was hiding from, towards them. I can’t remember. Big wheels are to do with big changes. I think is says that something was building up and it needed a big change to get away from it.
But then, 9 months later, one of the chief protagonists in that dream is back, and she’s having a baby with me. A baby can be about goals and nurturing and new beginnings, and the windows are about possibilities and opportunities.
Tomorrow is my due date, but I was a bit delayed.
So what’s happened in the last 9 months? Well, I can’t really see anything that fits my timelines and I can’t really see anything that’s going to happen within the next 36 or so hours that’s going to change that! Nothing happened that day back in October to signal an end nor a start.
The thing is, I’d actually approached this weekend in hope, which is such a weird thing off the back of a dream considering that I haven’t and don’t set targets or time constraints for any of the psychological inferences in those dreams. I was in hope of something, although I know not what, and now I’m wondering whether I was supposed to be chasing the unknown thing!
There’s a song by a guy called Duke Special called Freewheel, and one of the lyrics is this:
I’ve only got this morning to live.
Look at all the colors at my fingertips.
It’s approaching 5pm as I type. I still have time left before my due date, as well as the contingency time given to me virtue of my delayed caesarian. Is the inference to force that there’s always just a little bit of opportunity? Is this a good thing?